496. What Are In Your 3 Categories??

On this episode, Nellie encourages listeners to visualize achieving their 12 biggest desires over the next year and to explore how their future selves accomplished these goals. She discusses the importance of identifying what to add, delete, or let go of to make progress. Personal examples include maintaining consistent habits like taking 10,000 steps daily, adding kid-free work time, and letting go of the need to be liked by everyone. Nellie emphasizes the value of firm boundaries, minimalism, and focusing on what truly matters. She also highlights the significance of passion and action in achieving success and maintaining momentum.

We will touch on:

• Visualizing Future Success
• Curiosity and Inspiration from Others
• The Power of Visualization and Self-Reflection
• Identifying Areas for Improvement
• Personal Examples of Growth and Letting Go
• Embracing Boldness and Expanding Comfort Zones
• The Naked Method and Minimalism
• Focusing on the Dominant Category
• Taking Steps and Maintaining Momentum
• Final Encouragement and Closing Remarks

Let's Take Some Action:

• Create consistent time windows to work on the business without interruptions from kids.
• Be more firm and set clearer boundaries in business relationships, even if it means not being liked by everyone.
• Pitch and pursue interviews with big-name guests.

Shout out to René Barlow for sponsoring this episode!!

Transcript

Unknown: 1:23

Welcome back to the wake up and be wealthy show. I am so glad that you're here, because this is a really fun and powerful exercise to to go into a time machine and really put yourself into the future, right? Like, let's say you create those 12 big desires for the next 365, days that I've been talking about, like, poof, they're done. You're in the future. You have them. You're like, Oh my gosh. I like, This is amazing. Like, I can believe it, because, like, I put in the work, huh? I did it, right? Like, that always feels so good. Like, I can't wait to cross the finish line for my full marathon, because I just know that delicious feeling of crossing the finish line and just how good it feels right, like going to the eras concert with Sarah soon after that. Like I just, I'm already, like, living in it, in in even have it. Those things haven't they haven't happened yet, but I just, like, I can already feel it right. It's almost like you're already in the future. Like I felt that with, like, growing both of my kids and my tummy, and I'm like, Oh my gosh, the minute I can just, like, hold them on my chest. And I just can't wait, like, that anticipation of that future moment is amazing. Even when you go on vacation, you're like, oh my gosh, I just can't wait to, like, hear the ocean and, like, have a cocktail in my hand, right? Like, whatever it may be you, you know what I'm talking about. So I want you to, like, transport yourself into the future, and you have all of those things that you wrote down that you really, really are currently desiring. And like, you already have them, okay? And so you're looking at yourself in the mirror, and you're like, like, how did you do it? Right? Like, okay, like, you did it, but, like, How'd you do it? Like, because when we see somebody else create something that we desire, don't we ask that? Like, even if you don't directly ask them, we've all been there where, like, that person loses the weight, or they make a massive amount of money, or they, like, you know, spontaneously meet the love of their life, like something big in their life happens, and you're genuinely, hopefully excited for them. And then equally, you ask, how'd you do it? Right, like we're nosy humans, and especially when it's something juicy that we also desire, we're like, can you tell me? Can you like spill the tea? I'll never forget I spoke on the same stage as Gary V years ago, and when I got invited to that opportunity, I was in shock that the the event, was able to have Gary Vee come, and I even did this where I asked, I'm like, How'd you get Gary Vee here? Like, that's pretty cool. And he's like, I wrote a check. He's like, I wrote a check. Everyone has a price, right? And it just, it honestly made me laugh, because I was like, Oh yeah, it could actually be that simple, right? Like, he didn't have to, like, call in a bunch of favors, like he did a few, like, marketing strategies to, like, get his attention. But then he was like, prepared to, like, pay for his time, and Gary V has a price, y'all, and he came, and he was amazing. And so down to earth, and so cool. And, like, I was like, Oh my gosh, I just spoke on the same stage as Gary V that's pretty cool. But, yeah, that was just really interesting to me. So that's really what I'm talking about here, where you're, like, going into the future, you you meet your, you know, wealthiest self that created those 12 things that you're currently desiring right now. If you haven't listened to that episode, go back and listen. I like break it all down for you. It's so good. So those 12 things are created. And you're looking at your wealthiest self, and you're like, how do you do it? Right? And so this exercise is what she Okay, your future self is telling you. And when we can do this exercise, the reason why it's powerful is you're creating this out of body experience where you can start to see how your current self could be, either slowing you down, self sabotaging, and most importantly, actually making progress. Right? Because we are making progress, and it's hard to see it when you're like when you're in it right? But the goal here is that we also identify where you could be slowing yourself down, where you could be self sabotaging, and when we can pull that away faster. Wouldn't you know it that that weight that comes off helps you go faster? So with that being said, I want to give a shout out to our podcast sponsor of the day, which is Renee. Doesn't that just even sound good? She is here to support you with all of your book keeping needs, which it is never too early to get those books in order, especially with tax season. So you can just be on top. Of your game. So please, please, please, reach out to Renee. Her information is in the podcast episode, and that way you can connect with her and just see if you're a good fit and if she's a good fit for you and all of the things. But like, I've been so grateful to have bookkeeping in my business since the beginning, because that is not my strong suit that is not my zone of genius. And so it really helps to have just all of that really organized with your wealthiest self, like, I hope Renee is, like, going to be really excited that I'm saying this, but I really do mean it, like your wealthiest self has her books in order, right? Like she's financially organized. And so let's do that now, ladies, okay, let's do that now. Let's figure out what works for you. But if you don't have a bookkeeper, I encourage you to reach out to Renee and just say hey and see if she's a good fit for you. And like, I even remember years ago when I was in the nonprofit space. Obviously, a nonprofit doesn't have a lot of, like, extra money. Like, the goal is that operations are as minimal as possible in a nonprofit, and so we couldn't have a bookkeeper. It didn't make financial sense to have a bookkeeper for the nonprofit, but I said I called a bookkeeper that got recommended to me, and I said, Can you teach me? Can I pay you to teach me? And this amazing woman, her name was Lauren, she came and I paid her$75 an hour, and she sat next to me, I think at the time, I was like, 20 years old, and I believe this is what makes somebody really successful. They're willing to learn, they're willing to put in the time, and it was so helpful to have that person literally next to me that, like, just tell me what to do, right? Like, tell me what to do, and that way I can, like, understand it and then go do it, right? So little sidebar there, but let's dive into this exercise. Okay, so you're sitting across from your wealthiest self, and she's saying, This is what I did, right? You're like, how did you do it? And this is what she tells you. So the questions that you want to ask yourself in this exercise is, in order to create those 12 things, what do you need to be doing more of? What do you need to be adding in that you're not currently doing, this can be also personal and professional, okay? And what do you like need to delete, and this could even be like, let go, okay, but we all know that there are things that we need to delete we need to let go, maybe even delay, okay, I don't want you to think that you have to, like, abandon something or someone forever. So it may even be like a delay or a pause, but your energy is going in so many different directions, and it it can slow you down, right like we want to harness that energy, harness that focus, so you can actually create the 12 things that you desire and so much more. And the cool part about this framework is then you just rinse and repeat over and over and over again. Now logically, we know that we desire those 12 things, right? We want to put them on a piece of paper if we didn't desire them. But a lot of times we are self sabotaging and creating delays because we're afraid, right? We're afraid of having it, we're afraid of maybe losing it, we're afraid of what other people are going to think. And so so much of what actually is slowing us down is things that we're not right, who were not actually meant to be. And so that has been one of my biggest revelations, is like, I can actually just be who I am and accomplish everything that I want. Like, really, like that can happen. Like, I can be a, you know, a busy mom. I can be in leggings, which I am right now, and sneakers. Did you see him? I can just be my quirky, fun, silly, you know, self and like, people will actually like me, and they'll want to hang out with me, and they'll want to buy for me, right? Like that was, I had to work on that because I did not believe it. I did not believe it. I thought I had to always have it together. Like, if a child came into a video like, oh my gosh, like, they're on to me, type of thing, if a kid was screaming, you know, God forbid that I cuss, right? Always have my makeup on. Always have my hair perfectly done. I should be dressed to the nines like I was trying to be somebody that I really wasn't. And I had to let go. I had to let that go. So this category has been the biggest one for me, truly, like I am all about. Like, I'm an action taker. Maybe you're like me, like you tell me what to do. I'm going to do it. But like, for some reason this one was, this one was the most challenging for me, but also the most freeing. Okay, so I did this exercise earlier today, and I thought it was really, really powerful. And so I was going to share some of mine with you in this current moment, right? Because wealth is not a destination. Wealth is a journey. And so the finish line is always moving. And so you're technically, hopefully never going to meet your wealthiest wealthiest self, but you are going to hopefully meet the next version of your wealthiest self, and then, like, human nature is you're like, Okay, now, what, right, like, now, what do I want to do? This is really big in Hollywood, right where, like a lot of people in Hollywood that you admire don't necessarily need to do another movie. Or, like Taylor Swift, she doesn't really need any more money. She She's good, but she loves what she does. And that's why passion throughout this whole process is so important. Because when passion is fueling you, then you're you're doing it because you want to do it. It feels good, right? And that is really, really important. Okay, so the more category is really, like, a lot of it, well, adding in and, like, I think I said keeping too. So, like, things that you're already doing that are working right, but then we may want to add more into it. So we'll that those can all be clumped in because they're, either you're doing them, and we're going to keep doing them, or we want to do them more. So you can even just like, write a little bit like, ooh, do this one more. Okay, so I'm very, very consistent with my 10k steps. I always would, like, I always welcome more. But like, the the energetic minimum is 10k steps I take my green daily green shot every day. Okay, so greens, I take my ADHD meds. Okay, so these are, like, my habits that are really, really helping. Um, we're doing daily, uh, deals and giveaways. Okay, so daily deals and giveaways. So these are mine. Okay? I do live video very consistently. Okay, we have dedicated family time very consistently. I am gonna put a star next to that, because I can never get enough. I am happiest at home, truly like I just love being home. And then let's see what else here. Those are, like, the big ones so far, we can always go back. So the big one for me to add, I am craving consistent kid free time, where I can, just like, plow through a bunch of tasks and not get interrupted. That by far, is probably one of my biggest hurdles right now, because I can break things up during the day, but I'm finding, from an energetic standpoint, it like drains my energy. My brain feels like scrambled eggs because I have to stop and start. And that is by design. I decided to come home. I knew what I was getting myself into, right? Like, I closed down my office, we pulled Boone out of daycare, like I knew, like I knew what I was getting myself into. But I've been craving just like, a chunk of time. I don't need a lot of time. Like my business is very streamlined. I have support, but there are still things that only I can do. And what would feel incredible to me is just to have that, like, two hour block where I can just, like, run. I have that a lot of times for clients, but like, this is more for for me. So I've already been thinking about that and strategizing about that. So, like time windows to work on my business, Kid free, and they're consistent too. That's, that's the that's the kicker. Time windows to work on the business consistently. Okay, oops. One thing that I've recently let go of that has been so liberating is being at peace if someone is not down with how I am doing things in my business. I still had, like, a little bit of remnants in that, but like, I've taken a bold stance on like, this is how we're doing the fearless challenge. This is how wealthy year is going to go. You know, if you're paying us on a payment plan, like this is like, this is the these are the expectations. And if the payment is. Is there's a late fee. Like, I've really, like, we've been really stepping up our game on some energetic boundaries that I've kind of been a little loosey goosey on out of fear of somebody judging me for them. But like to be in my energetic bubble is a gift, just as much as it is to be in yours, and your energy is worth millions and millions and millions of dollars. I believe that to my core. And so when we have that loosey, goosey energy, it starts to drain that energy. And like, if you had, like, like, if I had a big bucket of cash, and I started flushing it down the toilet, and like, it was millions of dollars, you'd be like, no. What are you doing? Like, don't do that Nelly, right? And that was, like, your money, you'd be like, No. And so we get to protect our energy so much more than maybe we're doing right now. And so that has been a big one for me as of just even a few weeks. It's like, there gets to be more firmness and love, but firmness, right? Like, there's, there's a new sheriff in town, and like, we're going places, and like, we get to rise together. And equally, a lot of those things, I was an able enabling behavior that isn't helping that person either, right? And so it's like, taking that firm stance of, like, I'm here. I'm okay if you don't like me. Like, truly, whether you're working with me or not, I'm not here to be liked like, my husband likes me. For the most part, my kids like me. That's all that I need, right? Like, it's a bonus if you like me. I am here to change lives. And so I was really still struggling with, you know, the the goal of being liked versus the goal of being respected. And so you've gotta pick like. You've gotta pick which one is the dominant goal. Do you want to be respected or do you want to be liked? And it's very, very important, whether it's in business or in your personal life, if you heard the story that happened the other day at Walmart, you know a man was driving and I accidentally went down the wrong lane in the parking lot. I pulled over so he could go through, and he decided to roll his window down to scold me, and so I rolled mine down, but I spoke up for myself. So it's like again, like firm, energetic boundaries are key. He kept insisting for me to go over, but I was out of the way, right? It made no sense. And so I said, I will move when, like I will move and go into the other lane when I want to have a great day, I was out of his way keep it moving right. And so that was key, because again, loosey goosey energy could be running the show for you, and it spills over to other categories of your life, whether it's in business, your personal relationships, professional relationships, your kids. Like, I've even been getting more firm with some boundaries with my kids, because, again, loosey goosey energy. Like, just because I'm flexible and easy going doesn't mean I'm a doormat, and so I've had to really work on that, so letting go of doormat energy, to be honest, doormats are cute outside your door. That's it, okay. And it really does take time and practice, but persistency, so letting go of doormat energy, and I quite literally believe that my confidence has been skyrocketing because of it, right? Like, again, you don't have to be a bitch. You don't have to be mean. I, I believe in kindness, but kindness doesn't mean that you're a doormat. And so I've really had to work on that. Another thing that I noticed doing this exercise today was I, I've always put myself out there and in so many different ways, but I'm still holding back, like, when I, like, really thought about, like, my wealthiest self, and the How did you do it? Like, what landed for me was, go bigger. Go bigger. Like, be bolder, go bigger. And specifically, because that's vague, but like, specifically, there's some really big names that I desire to interview, and so I've noticed, like, Okay, why am I not pursuing that conversation yet? Is it out of worry of, what is it going to cost to interview that person, right? Do I think I'm ready for that? Like, I've had that thought a few times, or I'm like, Well, I'm still working on, like, this, that the other and it's like, no, like, you can at least get the process going, right? Like, start to get in the energy of it, which is what I've been teaching you, and when we can start to get into. The energy of it, it starts to regulate it and feel normal for you, which is huge, and you start to expand your comfort zone. So from the AB category, pitching big names to interview has been a big one for me. So these are just a few examples. I could fill and flood this whole page, but I wanted to, like, show you. And here's the most interesting part, probably a year and a half ago, this one was filled, filled like, Oh yes, I need to delete that. Delay that let that go. Let that go. Let that go. Okay, this might be people, places, things, thoughts, but if you find that you're my past self, like a year and a half ago, this one was what was the most full, okay, so when you're doing this and you're being really, really honest with yourself, look at which category is the most dominant. That's where you need to focus first. Okay, so the last year and a half have you heard me talk about this? I call it the naked method, like I have stripped away thing. Like, our house is so minimal, our budget is so minimal. Like, I don't get my nails done. I took, you know, the extensions out my makeup is more minimal, like my schedule is more minimal, like everything is so minimalist. And so I call it the naked method. And so the reason being is because this category was like suffocating me, like I couldn't even see the forest through the trees, because I like it was just so much. It was so much like I desired these things over here. And so letting go of all of this then created this category. So typically, depending on where you're asked, this will be the first one that you work on. Then this will be the second one, okay? And then this will be the third, okay. And the reason being is we want that strong foundation, but we can't have that strong foundation until we let a bunch of stuff go, and then we can add more in, and you'll be in the right mindset, and you'll be in the right energy to start adding in, and it will be very easy for you to see what you need or want to add in. Okay, so look at your list and then just pick one thing in the category that you're going to be focusing on, and you can still be working simultaneously on all three categories, but I would recommend one to be like, where the most amount of tension goes, like attention, so that way you can plow through that one so much faster. And the more you do that, the more momentum it'll create, the more confidence will create. And then you'll just be able to get to that wealthiest self and be like, Oh my gosh, we did it, right? We did it, and you could probably do it in record time. The more you keep leaning in. Don't give up, even when there's a hiccup, even when there's a setback, don't give up. Take a deep breath, focus on your list and take it one step at a time, okay, I love you. I'll see you next time. Bye.